Interview With a Bed Bug
Alana Korol
December 1, 2019
Today, we sat down with a local and quite chatty bed bug, Ben. Ben graciously agreed to answer our questions about his friends and family with the Bedbug Store. Let's get started.
First, Ben, thank you for agreeing to speak with us at the Bedbug Store.
Ben: It's my pleasure. I'm happy to answer all your questions about my clan.
BBPS: Let me ask you this: what is your favorite area to feed on people?
Ben: I love disrupting people while they sleep—the oxygen they emit when breathing is like a delicate perfume that lures me.
BBPS: Well, that's disturbing, but it's okay. Why do we not immediately wake up while we sleep?
Ben: Oh, well, fun fact: We have an interesting anesthetic in our saliva that promotes increased blood flow at the bite site, making the feeding process quick and nearly painless.
BBPS: That's a lovely superpower you all have. OK, next question. How long can you survive without food?
Ben: We are so lucky in this respect that we can go without food for up to a year. Can you?
BBPS: No, but that is an exciting diet idea, Ben. How long does it take you to feed your host?
Ben: We are like the drive-thru baby. It only takes us 5-10 minutes, and we are all full until the next evening.
BBPS: Thanks for tainting the 'drive-thru' for me, Ben. What is your worst fear as a Bed Bug?
Ben: People will buy your Bed Bug Patrol eco-friendly natural, plant-based treatments and rid me and my friends of existing.
BBPS: Thank you, Ben, for your honest and somewhat uncomfortable answers.
Ben: You are welcome!
So there we are, folks! Even bed bugs know that our Bed Bug Patrol Killer products will take them out without the overwhelming "I'm going to die if I breathe this in" smell. Our sprays have a pleasant peppermint smell, so you smell fresh, and that means clean and clear of any bed bugs and any of Ben's friends.
Until next time, stay alert, and if you see any rusty or black droppings in your bed, know that they could be bed bugs.
Let us at Bedbug Store assist you. Our products come with a 90-day, 100% satisfaction guarantee. Since 2003, we have been relieving customers of their bed bugs. Our products are also 100% all-natural, chemical, and pesticide-free. The smell you notice when using our solution is the fresh scent of peppermint.